Drunk
by Amaro's Wife
Summary: Nick and Olivia plus alcohol leads to something Olivia never expected, and a face from Olivia's past shows up. How will Olivia deal with it all?
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: I don't own any of the characters. They belong to male genitalia aka Dick Wolf.**

It was 8:40PM on a Friday night. The SVU detectives had just closed a huge case they had been working on for weeks. Spirits were high and they all decided to head down to Mulligan's bar for a few celebratory drinks.

Olivia, Nick, Fin, Amanda and Cragen sat at a table in the corner sipping their drinks and chatting about the case.

"Did you see Liv go badass Benson on that Rick guy?" Fin said, while trying to control his laughter.

"I sure did." Amanda chuckled, while high fiving Olivia.

"That's my girl" Nick said, smiling at Olivia.

Olivia blushed. "Okay, guys..enough." she laughed.

They all sat talking for another hour. Cragen was the first to leave, he never did feel comfortable sitting in a bar since he didn't drink anymore. Amanda and Fin soon followed as they were on call the next day.

"Another round, Liv?" Nick asked.

"Oh, I don't know, Nick. I'm feeling a little tipsy as it is." she laughed.

"Come on, one more won't hurt." he said, smiling at her.

"Okay, ONE more." she said, rolling her eyes at him.

Nick came back from the bar, with 2 beers and 2 shots of tequila.

"Tequila, Nick? really? are you trying to get me drink?" Olivia laughed.

"Maybe." he said, winking at her.

She had to be wrong right, no there was no way...was Nick flirting with her ? She laughed within herself, as if. Nick was now divorced so he was free and single, but she never thought for a second he would be interested in her, she had at least 10 years on him. It must be the alcohol, Olivia. You're misreading things.

Pretty soon, they both had taken their tequila shots and drank their beers. Olivia excused herself to the bathroom. When she came back she saw Nick had bought another 2 beers.

"What did i tell you last time, Amaro?" she said, pretending to be annoyed.

"Live a little, Benson." he said, taking a swig of his beer.

She rolls her eyes and gives in taking her seat next to him. What happened next she didn't expect. Nick scooted a little closer to her eye and whispered in her ear. "You're the most beautiful woman in this room, you know that?" Olivia thought she must be dreaming, this could not be real. She soon realized it wasn't a dream when Nick's hand found it's way under the table and began caressing her thigh. Her eyes went wide and she almost choked on her beer.

"Nick, what are you doing?" she whispered, but not doing anything to remove his hand.

"I'm living, Liv, I'm finally doing what i want for a change and what I'm supposed to do." he whispered in her ear.

She felt a shiver run down her body all the way to her core. Her head was screaming at her to end this now, remove his hand and tell him this couldn't happen, but her body and her heart were telling her different. She couldn't deny she had always found her partner attractive but this was wrong, she couldn't let this happen. If they went too far tonight and he regrets it tomorrow and leaves her just like everyone she loves always has she couldn't handle it.

"Stop it, Nick, you're drunk." she said, pushing his hand away from her, grabbing her coat and running out the bar.

She stood outside waiting for a cab, trying to put what had just happened out of her mind, when she heard his voice.

"I'm not drunk, Liv."

She didn't look at him she just kept her eyes on the road. Then suddenly he was right behind her, she could feel his hot breath on her neck. She had to hold back a moan.

"I'm not drunk. I want you Olivia, I've wanted you for months. Look me in the eye and tell me you don't feel the same and I'll never bring it up again?" he said, sounding like he was almost in pain.

She slowly turned to face him, her whole body shaking. She looked right into his eyes, god those eyes. She could get lost in them forever.

"Nick, I…" before she even realized his mouth was on hers, his hands running through her hair as he kissed her like she had never been kissed before. She knew she should push him away, but she couldn't she was done for. She kissed him back with with so much passion she surprised herself. This was not going to end well.

The door to Olivia's apartment flew up open. Olivia closed it by pushing Nick against it, while pulling his coat off, their mouths never parting. Soon all of their clothing was discarded. Nick picked Olivia up, she wrapped her legs around his waist as he slammed her into the wall.

"Are you sure about this, Liv? I need to know." he said, staring into her eyes hoping to god she said yes.

"God, yes" she moaned, as he kissed a particularly sensitive spot on her neck.

That was all he needed to hear. As he thrust inside of her, there was no need for foreplay both of them were more than ready. Olivia let out a gasp and bit down on his neck.

"Oh, Liv, wow." Nick growled, as they both adjusted to him inside of her.

Once he was sure, she was okay, he started to thrust deep and slowly into her.

"More, I need more, Nick...fuck me." Olivia panted through moans.

Nick lost it. He began thrusting as fast and hard as he could. His hands grasping her ass as he ravished her neck. He knew he would mark her but at that moment he didn't care.

Olivia was in pure ecstasy, she wanted to speak to tell him how good it was, but she couldn't even form a sentence. All she could feel was him inside her deeper than anyone had ever been, hitting spots she didn't even know existed.

All that could be heard was the sound of skin slapping together, Olivia's moans and Nick's grunting. They were completely lost in each other.

"Uh, uh, fuck...Nick...I'm.." Olivia started to say.

"It's okay, I got you, baby. Let go. venido por mí."

With that Olivia came undone. She screamed his name as she came around him, clawing at his neck. Feeling her tighten around him, Nick couldn't hold on any longer, he kissed her forcefully as he came deep inside of her.

They were both shaking. Clinging on to each other, sweat dripping from the both. After he was sure he wouldn't collapse he carried her over to the sofa and sat down with her still on top of him, him still inside of her. He put a hand on her cheek and looked into her eyes.

"That was amazing, Liv." he said, still struggling to get his breath back.

She looked at him, lazily, struggling to keep her eyes open. "Amazing is an understatement." she chuckled.

She had never felt more complete than with him inside of her. She lay against him, her eyes closing she couldn't fight it as sleep took over her tired body.

It was 8am the next morning, when Olivia woke up in bed. She didn't know how she got there but she assumed Nick had carried her in while she was asleep. She looked over to see Nick awake staring at her.

"What?" she asked, suddenly feeling self conscious.

"I wasn't drunk last night, and I'm not drunk now, Liv. I still want you." he said, with a look in his eye she had never seen before. It scared her, but it also excited her.

"So...does that mean you're still my partner?" she asked, worried about what his answer would be.

"Oh, you better believe it, Benson" he said with a huge smile on his face, as he leaned down and kissed her lips.

They lay together all morning, not speaking just enjoying being with each other. Olivia wasn't sure how this was going to end, but she was tired of thinking of the 'what if's' she was going to take a chance for once in her life.


	2. Chapter 2

**DISCLAIMER: I don't own any of the characters. They all belong to male genetalia aka Dick Wolf.**

**A/N: This was supposed to be a one shot, but I've decided to add a few more chapters. **

It had been almost a week since Nick and Olivia had slept together. Although there had been no repeat of that night, things were going well with them. They had lunch together every day at work and gradually started to get to know each other better.

"So let me get this straight, you don't drink coffee and you don't eat donuts...are you sure you're a cop?" Olivia said as they sat in their usual spot at Donna's diner.

Nick laughed. He wasn't sure where things were going with him and Olivia or how this was going to affect their jobs, but right now he didn't care. He loved spending time with her and seeing a side to her he didn't get to see often. She would never let anyone know it but Olivia Benson was just as goofy, girly and vulnerable as any other woman and Nick loved that. Sure badass Benson was a turn on, but cute and goofy Olivia was the woman he was falling for. Damn he was screwed.

Olivia was never one for letting her guard down with anyone. Her upbringing and her job probably had a lot to do with that, but with Nick she felt different, he made her feel different. She felt she could be herself around him and not be judged. Most of all though, she felt safe with him.

It was just after 10PM in the precinct and everyone had gone except Olivia and Nick who had a mountain of paperwork to finish.

Nick was sat at his desk staring at Olivia who was engrossed in her work. They had been working together for over 2 years now, but still her beauty mesmerized him just as much as it did the first day he met her. She had her hair curly today just the way he loved it. It made him think back to the night they spent together when he had his hands running through her hair while she moaned his name. It made his dick twitch just thinking about it.

Olivia looked up from her paperwork to catch Nick staring at her. He seemed to be daydreaming because he didn't notice she was now staring at him.

"Earth to Nick...Hello" she said as she waved her hands in front of his face.

"Oh, sorry." Nick said, looking down at his paperwork slightly embarrassed that she had caught him staring.

Olivia took that moment to really look at Nick. His tanned skin, dark hair and those beautiful lips. She thought back to the night those lips were on hers kissing her. She had to hold back a moan. She wanted him and she wanted him now. She looked around to make sure there was no one else around, as she stood and walked over to him.

"Everything okay, Liv?" Nick asked, looking up at her.

"No, I'm not okay, I need you now, Nick" she said, as she pulled him up from his chair by his tie and kissed him with as much force as she could.

Nick was taken aback he definitely wasn't expecting that. He knew he shouldn't because they were at work in the middle of the bullpen and anyone could walk in at anytime but feeling her lips on his he couldn't help himself as he kissed her back. Picking her up and sitting her on his desk, their tongues fighting for dominance, as he ran his hands through her hair. He couldn't help but become aroused as she she moaned into his mouth. He pulled her closer to him so she could feel exactly what she was doing to him. The moan that came from her drove him crazy and he almost came right there in his pants. He began to softly kiss her neck as one hand travelled down her body, giving her breasts a slight squeeze, she arched her back trying to push her breasts even further into his hand. Just as his other hand slipped into the front of her slacks and inside her lacy panties. He let one finger slide along her slit feeling how wet she was. He couldn't believe how wet she was already and all for him.

"God, Nick..I need you, now." Olivia moaned ito his ear.

That pushed him over the edge. "Turn around, now." he growled.

As Olivia complied, he hand his pants and boxers down in record time. His rock hard member more than ready. As he looked at his partner bent over his deck waiting for him, he lost all self control he ever had as he pulled her slacks and underwear down and entered her hard.

Olivia let out a yelp as he filled her. It was pain mixed with pleasure. Nick was worried he had hurt her though. "I'm sorry, baby. Are you okay ?" he asked concern filling his voice.

"I'm fine, don't stop. Nick..please." she whimpered.

At her words, he started to rock slowly in and out of her. He loved the feeling of how tight and wet she was. He definitely wasn't going to last long, not in this position.

Olivia couldn't believe she was doing this. Fucking her partner, bent over his desk in the middle of the bullpen but she needed him and it felt too good for her to stop it. As Nick started to thrust harder and faster into her she gripped on to the corner of the desk for support and had to stop herself from screaming.

"Yes, Nick that's it...oh, fuck." she whimpered, as Nick drove himself furiously inside of her.

Nick felt himself about to fall over the edge. This was the hottest thing he had ever experienced in his life. His head fell back as he savoured every moment.

Soon, he felt Olivia starting to tighten around him, he reached around and rubbed her clit while still pounding into her. Olivia came undone at that moment, she let out the scream she had been holding as she exploded around him. Nick followed right after exploding inside of her and collapsing on top of her.

As they both tried to steady their breathing, Nick kissed Olivia's neck up to her ear and whispered "I love you, Olivia Benson.". Suddenly he felt Olivia stiffen up and he soon realized he had made a big mistake as she pushed him off her and started to get dressed. Not looking at him or saying a word. Before he knew it she was dressed and running out of the bullpen.

"Olivia, wait." he shouted after her, but it was no use she just kept on running.

"Damn it, Nick..what have you done?" he said to himself as he started to get dressed.

**A/N: So what's going to happen ? Will Olivia keep running from Nick or will she give them a chance? Stay tuned. **


	3. Chapter 3

**DISCLAIMER: I don't own any of the characters. They belong to male genitalia aka Dick Wolf.**

**A/N: This chapter will be short, but I promise the next chapter will be longer.**

He couldn't remember how he got there but Nick found himself standing outside Olivia's apartment door. He almost walked away, but something inside of him wouldn't let him. He needed to talk to her, to apologize. He had really messed up.

"What was I thinking? you really are an idiot, Amaro." he said out loud to himself.

Just as he was about to knock on her door, it flew open. Olivia was standing there in her robe, her hair pulled back in a ponytail and her eyes red from crying.

"What are you doing here, Nick?" she said, annoyed that he had turned up at her apartment when all she wanted to do was be alone.

"I..em..how did you know I was out here?" he managed to stutter out.

"I heard you talking to yourself, that's a bad habit you have there. Now are you going to answer my question?" she said, getting more annoyed by the second.

"Oh.." he mumbled, feeling embarrassed that she had heard his rambling. "Look, Olivia, I'm sorry for what I said, I didn't mean it...well I did, but I didn't mean for it to come out in that moment. I can't help the way I feel about you though. know you feel the same way, but you're scared, I understand that, Liv, but…"

"Just stop, Nick." she said, cutting him off. "You're crazy. You love me? Oh please, so we had sex a couple of times, that's all it was to me, sex, nothing else. We're partners, you don't fall in love with people you work with. That's a personal rule for me. Now I need you to leave, Nick..please" she said, hoping that he had believed her and would leave because if he fought her she wasn't sure she could fight him back.

"Okay. Well thanks for clearing that up, Olivia." he said, as he turned to walk away, his heart breaking.

She was just about to close the door when he turned back.

"No, you know what, you really are screwed up. You can't even see something good when it's staring you in the face. You're in your 40s, single with no family because you won't let anyone close to you. Is this how you want to spend the rest of your life, Olivia? Lonely with nothing but your job in your life? You push everyone who cares about you away. No wonder your old partner left you without even saying goodbye." he said, anger taking over him. He was hurting and he wanted her to hurt too, but he knew bringing her old partner up was a low blow. The hurt in her eyes broke his heart.

"I didn't mean that, Liv. I'm sorr.." before he had a chance to finish she shut the door in his face. "Yep, you've done it again, Amaro." he said, shaking his head as he walked away.

Olivia felt like someone had punched her in the gut. She let her body slide down the door as her body shook with sobs. She knew Nick hadn't meant what he said but it still got to her and he was right. She ruined every good thing in her life. She was a screw up. She hadn't meant what she said to Nick either, but she couldn't let him get close because she would screw that up too and she couldn't handle losing another person in her life. When Elliot had left he took a piece of her with him that she could never get back. She would never be the same. She couldn't lose Nick too it would kill her. She would fix this and they could go back to the way they were before that drunken night.

Nick sat in Mulligan's bar he had already thrown back 4 shots of whiskey and now he was nursing a beer. The guilt was eating him alive, he couldn't forgive himself for what he had said to her. He knew how much that would hurt her. He was an idiot. She was never going to forgive him for that. He had well and truly blown it.

The next day, Nick walked into the precinct early. Olivia was already there sitting at her desk. He knew she had heard him walk in, but her eyes never left the computer screen.

"Good morning." he said, as he sat down across from her.

"Morning." she replied, her eyes not leaving the computer.

Nick looked around the bullpen. Amanda and Fin hadn't arrived yet and Cragen was in his office. He decided now was the best time to try and talk to her.

"Look, Olivia. I'm sorry about last night. What I said...it was out of order." he said, looking at her hoping she would respond.

She looked up at him and smiled. "Nick, don't worry about it. It's fine. We both said things we shouldn't have. What happened between us, it was amazing, but it shouldn't have happened. Let's just try and put this whole thing behind us and go back to being strictly partners and friends, you think you can do that?" she said, not quite believing her own words, but she had to try and fix this.

Nick wasn't sure if he could go back to being just friends and partners with her, but he knew if he wanted to keep their partnership he had to agree. "Yeah, I can do that." he said, smiling at her, while lying through his teeth.

They both went back to silently doing their paperwork as the room filled with other detectives.

**A/N Next chapter: Can Olivia and Nick make it work just as friends and partners? or will jealousy get the better of one of them? **


	4. Chapter 4

**DISCLAIMER: I don't own any of the characters. They all belong to male genitalia aka Dick Wolf.**

It had been 2 weeks since Nick and Olivia had agreed to put what had happened behind them and just be partners. It had been going pretty wll so far. They didn't discuss anything apart from work and both stayed a safe distance away from each other.

It was a quiet Wednesday night in the precinct. The only people left were, Nick, Olivia and Amanda. The three of them had paperwork to finish off.

"Hey, Amaro. how's the single life treating you?" Amanda said, taking a break from her paperwork and putting her feet up on her desk.

"Fine." Nick said, simply.

"So...are you dating?" she added, trying to keep the conversation going.

"I really don't see how that concerns you, Rollins" he spat, getting up from his chair and heading up to the cribs.

Olivia looked up from her paperwork surprised at Nick's reaction. Her eyes followed him up to the cribs.

"What did I say?" Rollins asked, looking at Olivia with complete confusion written on her face.

"I have no idea" Olivia said, looking back down at her paperwork.

Around half an hour later Nick came down from the cribs. He felt terrible for snapping at Amanda and wanted to apologize to her.

"Hey, Amanda, look I'm sorry about that earlier. I'm just not in the best of moods today, I shouldn't have taken it out on you." he said, as he walked over and took a seat next to her.

"It's cool, don't sweat it. We all have our moments." she said, smiling at him and patting him on the shoulder. It was then that he looked over at Olivia's desk and noticed she wasn't there and her coat was gone. He knew she couldn't have been finished her paperwork because they both had a mountain to finish.

He turned back to Amanda. "Where'd Liv go?

"She said and I quote 'Screw paperwork, it can wait until tomorrow. I have a date tonight.' and then she left just like that. Alright for some eh." Amanda laughed, getting back to her paperwork.

Lucky for Nick she didn't notice the hurt in his eyes at what she had just told him. He felt like someone had ripped out his heart and stomped all over it. Olivia has a date? with who? he really wanted to know the answer to his second question. The jealousy he felt at that moment was like nothing he had ever felt before. He walked back to his desk and tried to concentrate on his paperwork. It was useless all he could think about was Olivia and what she was doing right now. He was torturing himself, but he couldn't help it. She had his heart.

Two hours later Nick left the precinct having somehow managed to finish his paperwork off. As he drove home his thoughts were still stuck on Olivia. Just the thought of her with another man made him want to vomit. He thought he could handle just being partners with her but now he realized he was kidding himself. He was in love with her and that would never change no matter how much he tried to push it out of his mind. As soon as he got home he pulled a six pack of beer from the fridge and popped one open and turned on the tv. An hour and 3 beers later he couldn't take it anymore. He threw on his coat and walked out the door.

Olivia was sat in her apartment sipping a glass of wine thinking about how much of a disaster her date had been. She wasn't even sure why she had went because if she was honest the guy wasn't her type at all, but she needed someone to take her mind off of her partner for a while. Not that it worked, she spent the whole date thinking about him and wishing things could be different between them. If they weren't partners, if she had the balls to let down her walls and actually let him in. Instead she had pushed him away like she did with everyone who got too close to her. She had blown it and she only had herself to blame.

She got up ready to head to bed when there was a knock at her door. She walked to the door and looked through the peep hole to see her partner standing there. She sighed as she opened the door.

"Nick, what are you doing here?"

"I'm sorry, Liv, I had to come, I was driving myself crazy at home...can I come in?" he said, his eyes pleading with her to say yes.

She moved out of the way and opened the door a little more letting him in. He walked over to her sofa and sat down, rubbing his hands down his face.

"Do you want a drink?" she asked, not quite sure what he was doing here.

"No, I need to you to sit down next to me, Liv...please?"

She hesitated but did as he asked. Sitting next to him but keeping a safe distance between them.

"What's going on?" she asked, staring at him.

"How did your date go?" he asked, not really wanting to know but he had to bring it up.

"Fine..why?" she said.

"You know why, Liv." he said, looking into her dark brown eyes.

He was right, she did know why but she didn't want to talk about it. "Nick, don't do this. You need to go." she said, as she walked toward the door, opening it.

Nick followed her to the door, slamming it shut. "I'm not going anywhere, until you admit how you really feel to me. I'm tired of this. I'm tired of pretending that there is nothing between us. Pretending that I'm not hopelessly in love with you. I'm so tired, Liv, so tired." he said, as he cupped her face with his hands forcing her to look into his eyes.

"Please, Nick. please go." she pleaded with him while trying to hold back the tears that were forming in her eyes.

"I can't, Olivia." he whispered, as he leaned forward capturing her lips with his.

She didn't want to kiss him back but she couldn't stop herself. She poured every emotion she had been holding back for weeks into that kiss and tears streamed down her face as he picked her up and carried her into her bedroom, never breaking their kiss as he lowered her down onto the bed, laying on top of her. Nick broke the kiss only to pull her top over her head. He looked down at her lying beneath him in her black lacy bra and her hair fanned out on the bed. She was the most beautiful creature he had ever seen.

"God, you're so beautiful." he whispered as he leaned back down to kiss her again.

Soon all clothes were removed from both their bodies. Nick was on top of her, between her legs, ready to enter her.

"I need to know this is what you really want, Liv? he said, looking down at her. Her passionate kiss was all he needed to let him know she wanted this as much as he did. As he slowly entered her, Olivia bit down on his bottom lip to stop herself from crying out. He almost lost it right there, it took everything he had to stop himself from thrusting himself hard inside her, but he wanted to do it right this time, treat her like she deserved to treated. His eyes never left hes as he thrust slow and deep loving the feeling of her and the sounds of her soft moans. He never wanted this to end.

They made love that night several times. It wasn't just sex there was no denying that. The whole time he was inside of her they never broke eye contact it was the most intense thing he'd ever experienced and he realized then that no matter how much she tried to push him away he could never let her go. Even if she didn't want it his heart was hers.

The next morning as they lay together, Olivia laing on top of his body. Nick knew he had to ask the question but he was terrified of what her answer might be.

"Liv..I need to know.." he started to say, but was cut off by her kissing his lips. He moaned at the taste of her. He would never get tired of kissing her that he knew for sure. He tried to deepen the kiss and groaned as she pulled back.

"I know what you want from me, Nick, but I just can't give it to you right now. I'm not ready for that. I can admit that I don't want this, whatever this is between us to end, but can we just see where it goes and not rush into it?" she said, looking into his eyes.

He smiled at her and pulled her head back down to lay on his chest. "Whatever you want, baby. I'm just happy you're willing to give us a chance. If I'm honest I expected you to be throwing me out of here this morning." he said, laughing as he kissed the top of her head.

"Well, I did think about that, but I tried that already and you keep coming back like a bad smell so.." she joked, as he rolled them over so he was lying on top of her.

"Is that right, Benson?" he said, smirking down at her.

"Yes, and I suggest you get off me before Little Nicky there gets any ideas, we have work in an hour." she said, pointing at the clock as she pushed him off her and got up heading towards the bathroom. As she got to the bathroom door she turned and looked seductively at him. "Care to join me, Amaro?".

Nick was like a bullet as he ran from the bed and into the bathroom after her. As they made love once again in the shower neither of them had any idea Olivia's phone was ringing. They could never have imagined who it was on the other end or what the person wanted.

**A/N: Any guesses who it is that's calling Olivia? You'll find out in the next chapter.**


	5. Chapter 5

**DISCLAIMER: I don't own any of the characters. They belong to male genitalia aka Dick Wolf.**

**A/N: Thanks for the great reviews so far. I'm really glad you're enjoying the story.**

Olivia sat at a corner table in a diner waiting for the person she was meeting. It had been two days since she saw the missed call on her phone and listened to her voicemail and she still couldn't believe she was actually here waiting for this person. Part of her told her that she should leave right now and not look back, but the other part of her kept her glued to her seat. She had her back to the door of the diner, but she didn't have to turn around to know he was there behind her, she sensed him just like she always could.

"Elliot?" she said, turning around and coming face to face with her old partner for the first time in over two years. She felt the tears pooling in her eyes. She couldn't believe he was actually right there in front of her. He hadn't changed much, except he looked a little thinner and his hair was turning slightly grey, but other than that he looked just like he did two years ago, they day he walked out of the precinct and out of her life.

"Hey, Liv." he said, taking a seat across from her. He first noticed that her hair had changed, it was longer and curly. She looked good, but he could tell just by looking into her eyes she wasn't the same Olivia he had known two years prior. As she stared at him with a single tear running down her left cheek, he knew he had some explaining to do.

"Liv, I know my call must have come as a real surprise after all this time and I want to apologize for not keeping in touch with you. I didn't know how to handle what happened with Jenna, I couldn't face the precinct, Cragen, Munch, Fin or you, Olivia. Especially you. I was so ashamed of what I had become. I wanted to hide away from the world. I realize now though, how stupid I was for shutting you out. I lost my best friend, and I know you may never be able to forgive me, Liv, but I had to see you I had to make things right between us." he said, holding back the tears he could feel building in his own eyes..

Olivia sat there still in shock that he was sitting there across from her. Her head was spinning. She wanted to say something back to him, but she couldn't find the words. Part of her was furious at him and another part of her wanted to wrap her arms around him and tell him it was all okay. It wasn't okay though. He had damn near destroyed her and she couldn't forgive him for that.

"Elliot, I hope you feel better getting that off your chest, I really do. It changes nothing for me though. We were partners and best friends for twelve years, twelve years, Elliot, and you just walked away from that like it was nothing. Like I was nothing to you. You know I always remember something your mother said to Katleen, "He doesn't hate you. Believe me if he hated you, he would just walk out of your life." and that's exactly what you did to me!" she said, trying to stay calm and stop herself from crying. "So I don't know what it is you want from me, but you're not going to get it. I'm done. I have moved on and I'm finally getting my life back together. So I'm going to get up now and leave, and I don't want to hear from you again, okay?" she said her voice cracking as she spoke the last sentence, as she got up and walked out of the diner with tears streaming down her face.

Elliot sat there staring at the spot where Olivia had just been sitting moments ago, he had expected her reaction, but it still hurt him and he hated himself for what he had done to her. He was a bastard. She had left before he had a chance to tell her what he actually planned on telling her after he apologized, but she would soon find out anyway and he just hoped she could forgive him in time. He sighed as he got up from the table and left to head home.

The next night, Olivia and Nick lay in her bed after making love, his arm around her as she lay her head against his chest. She had told Nick, she had met up with Elliot but she didn't really want to talk about it so he didn't press her. He was still walking on eggshells around her afraid that she would end things with him at any moment. He looked down at her and noticed she looked deep in thought.

"What's on your mind?" he asked.

She looked up at him and smiled, "I'm just thinking about how happy I am right now, I finally feel like things are looking up for me you know. Meeting with Elliot yesterday, yeah I was angry but it gave me a sort of closure in a way and I feel like I can stop looking back at the past and wondering 'what if' and I'm looking to my future. A future that includes you, Nick."

Nick couldn't help the grin that spread across his face at her words.

"You mean that, Liv?" he asked, not quite being able to believe her.

"Every word." she said, as she leaned up and kissed his lips. Nick deepened the kiss, pulling her on top of him. Things were just getting heated when Olivia's cell phone rang.

"Leave it, baby." Nick moaned, kissing her neck.

"I can't, it could be Cragen. We're on call remember." she groaned, as she pushed herself off of him and walked over to her dresser to pick the phone up. She answered it without checking the caller ID.

"Benson...Okay, cap, I'll be there as soon as I can." she said, hanging up the phone.

"I guess we have to go in then." Nick groaned while picking up his phone expecting his call from Cragen any second.

"Actually no, he only asked me to go in he said he has to speak to me about something." she

said, with a look of worry on her face. She had no idea what Cragen wanted to talk to her about but whatever it was it she had a feeling she wasn't going to like it.

Forty five minutes later, Olivia walked into the bullpen. It was empty, everyone had gone home except Cragen who was in his office.

"Hey, cap." she said, knocking on the door.

"Hey, Liv, come in and take a seat." he smiled up at her.

"I'm okay. What's going on, cap?" she asked, nervously.

Cragen had been thinking of ways to tell her this since he found out, but he now realized he had to just come out and tell her.

"Elliot's coming back, Liv." he said, watching her face closely for her reaction. He didn't know whether she would take it well or not. He knew how much she had been missing Elliot since he left, but he also knew how much it broke her and how much she had been struggling. It had only been very recently that she had started to go back to her old self and allowed herself to bond with Amaro. Her reaction hadn't been what he was expecting though. She just stood there saying nothing.

"Did you hear what I said, Olivia?" he asked.

Olivia had heard him loud and clear, but she couldn't believe what he had said. Elliot was coming back? how?...why? she had so many questions she wanted to ask but she couldn't find the words.

"Okay." she said, simply.

He waited for her to say more, but she just stood there her face giving nothing away.

"He starts back tomorrow. I'm going to partner him up with Munch for a few days and see how it goes. Look Olivia, I know.."

"Captain, I really have to go." Olivia cut him.

"Okay, goodnight, Liv." he sighed, but she had already walked out of his office and out of the bullpen.

Cragen sighed again as rubbed his hands down his face. He had a feeling this was not going to end well and he was already regretting letting Elliot rejoin the squad, but he was still like a son to him and he had missed him. He just prayed that he and Olivia could work things out and that Elliot and Nick didn't take each other's heads off.

Nick had fallen asleep while Olivia was gone, but he woke up as soon as she walked into the bedroom. He noticed that she looked completely worn out and her eyes were red and puffy. She had definitely been crying. He was now really worried.

"Everything okay? what did Cragen want?" he asked.

After an a few seconds of silence she spoke. "Elliot's coming back." she said, not looking at him as she started to undress and slip on an NYPD t-shirt .

Nick wasn't sure he head her correctly. Elliot, Olivia's old partner was coming back? it all made sense now him wanting to meet up with her yesterday. He didn't know the guy, but he knew how close he and Olivia had been and how it affected her when he had left suddenly. He wanted to tear him a new asshole so he could only imagine how Olivia felt right now.

"How do you feel about it? you wanna talk? he asked as she climbed into bed next to him.

Olivia turned to him and brought her hand up to cup his cheek and stared into his big brown eyes. "No. I want you to make love to me, Nick. Make me feel good." she said, her eyes pleading with him.

Nick knew she wasn't okay and they needed to talk about this but it could wait until the morning, right now she needed him and he wasn't going to deny her. He ran a hand through her hair and looking loving into her eyes before capturing her lips with his.

**A/N: What's going to happen on Elliot's first day back? Will Olivia be able to work alongside him? and how will Nick & Elliot's first meeting go? All coming up in the next chapter. **


	6. Chapter 6

**DISCLAIMER: I don't own any of the characters. They belong to male genetalia aka Dick Wolf.**

The next morning Nick sat at his desk across from Olivia. They hadn't had a chance to talk about Elliot like he had planned as they woke up late and he had to rush home to get ready. He could tell just by looking at her though that she wasn't okay, no matter how much she tried to hide it from him and everyone, he knew her and inside she was crumbling. He hoped they would get a chance to talk at some point today or if not then after work.

Just as he was about to get back to his paperwork he saw Olivia's eyes look at the door and then back down at her paperwork. He knew who she waiting for to walk through those doors and he felt a tinge of sadness. Sure Olivia was angry and hurt with Elliot now, but what if she forgives him and wants to partner up with him again? where was that going to leave him? and how was it going to affect their new relationship? He was worried.

Olivia sat nervously at her desk trying to work on her paperwork, but she couldn't help looking up at the door every time she heard someone walk in. She knew he would be here any minute and she wasn't prepared. Up until yesterday she had never in a million years thought she would see Elliot walk back through the precinct doors and now it was really going to happen. Just when she had finally started to get over him and move on here he was coming back into her life and playing with her emotions all over again. She didn't know how she was going to face working with him, but she knew if she wanted to stay in the unit she would have to. She decided she needed another cup of coffee before she could handle coming face to face with him again. Just as she got up and headed over to the coffee machine she head Fin's voice.

"Elliot?" Fin said, sounding in complete shock. Cragen hadn't told any of the other detectives about Elliot's return yet. He knew Olivia needed some pre warning but he figured his other detectives would be okay.

At the sound of Elliot's name Olivia spun around her eyes landing on her old partner standing at the door of the bullpen looking unsure of whether he should walk in any further. She couldn't move, she was frozen on the spot. Although she had been expecting him, nothing could prepare her for actually seeing him walk back into this room. She saw Fin walk up to Elliot and shake his hand, and Cragen coming out of his office and hearing him announce Elliot would be rejoining the squad. He then went on to introduce him to Amanda who put on her biggest smile as she shook his hand and then it was Nick's turn.

"Elliot, this is Nick Amaro. Nick, this Elliot Stabler." Cragen said as he looked between the two men.

"Nice to meet you, Amaro." Elliot said, putting his hand out for Nick to shake.

Nick could feel the anger building up inside of him. This was the prick who had completely broken the women he loved and he was supposed to shake his hand. He wanted to tear his head off. He looked over at Olivia and noticed she still hadn't moved from her spot at the coffee machine. She looked like she was about to burst into tears. He really wanted to run over to her and hold her in his arms, but he couldn't do that in front of their colleagues. He realized though that he couldn't make this any worse for Olivia by having a go at Elliot so reluctantly stretched out his and shook Elliot's hand and gave him a forced smile, but said nothing.

At that moment Elliot turned in Olivia's direction and slowly made his way towards her. He stopped a couple of feet back though unsure whether she would take a swing at him or not. He would deserve it if she did he knew his sudden return would have made her even more angry at him than she was two days ago when they hat.

"Hey, Liv." he said, almost in a whisper. He searched her eyes for something to let him know what was going through her mind, but he saw nothing. Maybe he had been away for so long he couldn't read her anymore.

Olivia's head was spinning. She wanted nothing more than to walk away from him and walk out of the precinct, she knew she couldn't do that and it took all of her strength to form the words she needed to say.

"Hi, it's good you're back, Elliot." she somehow managed to reply as she gave him a weak smile and walked past him to her desk to sit down. She was sure if she didn't sit down now her legs were going to buckle.

Everyone in the room could feel the tension and suddenly felt very awkward. Munch as always broke the silence with a joke making everyone laugh and walked over to Elliot, putting his arm around him.

"What's up, partner? I'm sure it was not your dream to have me as a partner, but alas here we are. Atleast my ass won't distract you, huh." he laughed, patting Elliot on the back and walking off.

Elliot smiled at Munch, he had missed his humor. His smile was a forced one though because he could see Olivia was hurting and that was hurting him deeply. He had thought about not returning after meeting with Olivia and hearing what she had to say, but it had been too long and he needed to come back. He felt his work here wasn't done and he needed to make things right with her. He knew it would take time, but he hoped eventually she would come around and they could go back to how they used to be. Who was he kidding? they would never be like that again he had ruined that, but if they could even have half of the relationship they used to have then he could be happy.

As he walked over to his new desk, he looked over at Olivia and the man he had been introduced to as Nick Amaro sitting across from each other. He had guessed Amaro was her partner he knew it the moment he was introduced to him. He could feel the anger from the man and how he looked over at Olivia. He couldn't blame the guy, he was just glad to see he cared about Olivia and that made Elliot feel a bit better. As he watched them though he noticed something. Every so often Nick would look up from his paperwork and look at Olivia and the look in his eyes told Elliot everything he needed to know. Nick Amaro was in love with Olivia Benson. He wondered if Olivia knew, if maybe something was going on with them. He couldn't help the pang of jealousy he felt at the thought, he had struggled with his feelings for Olivia for years, but he was married then and he is still married now. If she was happy then so was he. He settled down at his new desk and unpacked his things making it his own.

The rest of the day went by pretty fast and Olivia was glad she and Nick had been out of the precinct working most of the day because it meant she didn't have to work too much with Elliot. By the time they returned to the precinct most people have left for the day including Elliot. Olivia let out a sigh of relief when she saw that he had gone.

"You okay?" Nick asked, hearing her sigh.

"Yeah, I'm fine." she smiled at him as they both sat down at their desks .

Just as they were about to start on their paperwork Cragen came out of his office.

"Hey, you two, it's late go home. The paperwork can wait until the morning." he said, knowing it had been a tough day for Olivia.

"No complaints from me." Nick said, standing to put his coat on.

"Me either." Olivia said. "Goodnight, captain."

"Goodnight, I'll see you both in the morning." Cragen said walking back into his office and closing the door.

Nick watched as Olivia put on her coat. She really was the most beautiful woman he had ever laid eyes on. Every moment he spent with her he fell a little bit more in love with her. That scared him because he still wasn't sure whether she loved him and he didn't want his heart broken. He had known long ago that she had been in love with her old partner it was obvious, he thought now she was over him though, but with Elliot's return he wasn't so sure anymore. He was snapped out of his thoughts when he saw Olivia staring at him with a confused look on her face.

"What?" she asked.

"Nothing." he said, shaking his head. "Do you want a lift home?"

"Sure." she said, as they began walking out of the building.

The car ride to Olivia's apartment was mostly a silent one. Nick tried making conversation, but she didn't seem up to talking so he left her to stare out the window lost in her thoughts.

They soon pulled up to Olivia's apartment and without having to ask Nick followed her up. As soon as they walked into the apartment and closed the door, Olivia practically lunged at Nick kissing him and pulling his coat off. Nick pulled away from the kiss.

"Olivia, wait, we need to talk." he panted, out of breath from her passionate kiss.

"I don't want to talk." she said, breathlessly as she attempted to kiss him again.

Nick pulled away from her again. "No, I'm not doing this until we talk, Liv. I know you're hurting right now and I want you to open up to me.". He was now cupping her face and looking into her eyes as he tried to get through to her. She pushed his hands away and walked into her kitchen, opening a cupboard and pulling out a bottle of Bourbon.

"Just go, Nick." she spat, with her back to him as she poured the alcohol into a glass.

"No, I'm tired of you shutting me out. I want you to tell me what's going on in your head." he said, raising his voice a little and pulling her around to face him, he was pissed and he was tired of her doing this.

"I said GET OUT!" she screamed into his face. Nick had seen Olivia angry many times, but he had never had it directed at him this way, but he didn't care he knew she was just trying to push him away again and putting up her walls. He wasn't going to let her this time.

"No, I'm not going anywhere. No matter how much you try to push me away, Olivia. I'm here for the long haul." he said cupping her face with his hands and making her look into his eyes. "I know, you're scared to let me in to your heart and I understand, but I'm not going anywhere. I love you and I'm here to stay as long as you will have me." He had tears in his eyes now. He was opening his heart completely to her even though he knew she might stop all over it.

Olivia tried to stop the tears from falling from her eyes, but she was powerless as they spilled down her face and she collapsed into Nick's arms as she sobbed.

Nick held onto her as she completely broke down, letting every built up emotion spill out of her. He ran his fingers through her hair comforting her and kissing her head just allowing her to get it all out.

They ended up sitting on the kitchen floor, Nick still holding her as she cried. Pretty soon she had cried herself to sleep. He carefully picked her up and carried her into her bedroom, pulling the cover back and laying her down. He carefully took off her shoes, but decided on leaving her clothes on because he didn't want to wake her. For a moment he just stood there looking down at her. His heart was breaking seeing her cry like that, but he was also happy that she had finally let it out and allowed herself to break in front of him. It was a huge breakthrough for her and them. He undressed himself down to his boxers and climbed into bed next to her, wrapping an arm around her waist and kissing her forehead.

He wasn't sure what tomorrow was going to bring for them, but one thing he knew was he was going to stick by her through everything whether she liked it or not.

**A/N: Next chapter: Nick & Elliot have a talk, Olivia & Elliot talk and Olivia & Nick go on a romantic date. **


End file.
